#1 Date Substance Abuse

Photography: Verabanana on deviantart

Let's set the mentality of the scene: freshman year of college, newly single (out of a two year relationship) and open to dating a variety of guys.

The Meet-Cute: Dressed like the "mean girls" in Jingle Bell Rock attire (leaving a movie themed Christmas party) four of the five roommates arrive at a birthday/Christmas party of a high school friend of the Glendale roommates. To the non-college eye, we probably looked like (and smelled like) baby prostitutes - like the reference? Already "loosened up" from our first stop, I begin wandering and introducing myself. I happen upon this cute blonde with green eyes (surprised?) and sit down to talk to him. We end up kissing (stupid alcohol) and then I backtrack and he gets my number. We decide a date is in order.

The Date: He decided dinner and a movie, so Pei Wei (let's be nice and say he paid) and then to Harkins. We get to the theater and he parks. I go to grab my purse and open the door but stop when he says wait and reaches into the back part of the cab of his truck. He pulls out a beer and chugs it. Who does this?! More over, he doesn't offer me one! Is this date so horrible you need to chug a beer to get through a movie? As I'm staring at him in disbelief he then proceeds to reach into his center console and pull out a bag of weed. This time he asks if I want to share. I tell him no, and watch him further flush himself down the toilet. Against my better judgement, I don't call anyone to have them pick me up, instead I sit next to the stoned alcoholic and watch Blood Diamond.

Needless to say, that was a date not even worth an ounce of my energy.

Look forward to the next date blog: your nickname is killing this date

New style for my blog?

So, the past few days at work I've had a regular visitor. He has slyly hit on me, has an impeccable memory and is mentally ill. He has a kind soul; we usually talk for a bit when he stops by on his way to work. These types of people seem to find me and latch on. They'll talk forever! It makes me wonder if maybe I should look into special education (as suggested by my test results from the SII).

Through the winding way that thoughts travel, I landed at all of the INCREDIBLY awkward dates I've gone on. So, then I started thinking recounting these would probably be hilarious as a blog... For everyone else at least. My only issue is what order to write them in - if I go chronologically that I'll miss some and have to go back. It's decided. They'll be random. Let the madness begin!

Dreamland

I'm more than mildly impressed with the mind's willingness (or maybe it's forced on a physiological level) to uninhibit itself while sleeping.

I had a "eyes flash open, hair matted in sweat, heart pounding through my chest, brain racing to catch up with reality" moment last night. Why does our body torture itself like this? Various scientists make the claim that it's our brain trying to prepare us; it's teaching us how to survive through the worst possibilities. If that's the case, my mind is readying me for the apocalypse.

It pulled out all the stops last night. I'm not talking zombies and werewolves - think of your deepest fears and multiply them until you're in the corner crying. Yes, it was that fun. So, my question is, now that I've battled through the terrors lurking in the corners of my thoughts (and my brain gave me the upperhand - I couldn't prevent the crushing events, but I never lost hope) will I indeed be more prepared to handle and logically evaluate similar situations if they actually occur? A Nova episode on dreams discussed studies that showed improved performance on specified activities that the subject had dreamt about previously. (ex. Man dreams about ping-pong and afterwards plays more skillfully)

Scary dreams can claw their way into my slumber, I'll handle it. My brain must have great plans for me... World domination?

A sad day.

Something horrible happened this weekend. I try so hard to keep my guard up - if I'm not vulnerable nothing can hurt me, right? Well, I failed at that yesterday. I was courted and couldn't resist. My life is forever changed, because now I'll always wonder if I can ever have anything quite as good as what I so briefly got to taste. I understand now why so many put so much effort into having something like this - the way it makes you feel elated and powerful is addicting and irresistable. It's like nothing and no one can stand in your way.

Meet Aiden

Surgery

Dad just finished getting hip surgery, and all went well! I have a feeling the next six months will be a struggle for all of us.

Awarded for poetry

I've been digging through old files looking for records/letters of rec and found this in the process. It's a poem I wrote my senior year of high school that won some awards. The piece that was submitted was visually structured differently than how I typed it below, but it would take me forever to re-create it!

Secluded

Troublesome thoughts traipse through her mind
Her delicate profile hangs heavy with reflection
The undisclosed secrets bear down on her soul
elegant, unrevealing, engrossed
Alone with only her feelings of distress
Her fair figure languishing
for one to come unbind her trapped spirit.

Just my journals

Not really art, but here are the covers of my journals. :)

Front cover from freshman year through junior year

Front and back cover from the middle of junior year to the middle of senior year

Front and back cover of my journal from the middle of senior year til now!

I have collages on all of the inside covers too... but those are a little more personal :)

Re-design

Tonight is the night I re-design... excited for a new look!

Now I'm REALLY published!

Check out my article on She Knows!  :)

Chemical Peels: At home vs. professional

Beautiful life

This is going to be a little bit of rambling... I've got lots to say.

First of all, I have such wonderful family and friends - they gave me one of the best birthdays yet.  Here's to 23!

Being a pony for Aubrey and Alyx

Kelly, Dustin and I heading out to Mill to celebrate my birthday!

The Fearsome Five re-united at Maloney's in Tucson :)

These were only some of the birthday celebrations.  Not pictured is a dinner with Kieren, Anson, Kelly and Dustin, a dinner with just Mom and Dad and Vegas celebrations with Kelly, Jill and Mom.  TOO MUCH FUN!

On the work side: my boss from IWS sent my article over to She Knows - just waiting to hear from them on when it's up!  Exciting!  Also, I got an email today from a parent at HHS, it looks like I'll be tutoring her daughter.  I'm looking forward to getting back into languages and helping someone else learn them.  Languages are truly beautiful.  Hopefully it all goes well!  I'm completely lost in the work world.  I want to have a job I'm passionate about... and the more I think about it, the more I want to live in another country and teach.  I'm looking into Chile, Argentina and Spain.  (Kelly, don't freak out, I promise I'll keep you in the loop, and it's a big process even getting accepted into teaching... I haven't ruled out Irvine by any means!)

So, I love reading all of my friends blogs.  And there are a lot of them: Kelly, Kieren, Lauren S, Lauren O, Claire, Alyse... I'm sure I'm missing some.  I group them into 4 categories: factual online scrapbook/diary, journalist style, and deep thoughts - either directed toward an audience or used as a form of release.  I feel like mine at the moment is very dry: I did this at this time with these people.  Awesome.  I want to change it.  If you are a friend of mine you already know what I did when, because you were with me.  Sooo, my new goal is to write with more of a purpose I guess - like what I did for IWS.  Have a topic that I'm passionate about, or maybe even share some of my secrets with you.  Let's hope I can stick to it.

And for the grand finale... Welcome to the world Haylee Noreen Howard! :) Born on October 11th perfect as can be.